Having Fun

Kirk just listened to Adison, letting her speak without comment. He leaned into her hand a little and closed his eyes, quiet for a few moments. "I thought I could handle this... I was supposed to bring some order to the Elite so that they could please the FBI enough to be allowed to stay a separate entity. Instead, I've gotten nothing but resistance from the Elite, and the FBI still isn't happy. The Elite is no better off than they were. That's why I'm failing." 

He straightened up again, leaning back against the wall. "You're right... the Elite functions differently than any other law enforcement branch. That's what made me fall in love with them in the first place. They dared to defy what was normal and set their own course." He shook his head. "But they're not in control of their own future. The FBI is. And if the Elite can't please them, then... they're gonna be shut down, and there's nothing I can do about it. I have tried so hard to get the Elite to play the game, and they simply won't." 

Pausing once more, he finally shook his head. "I understand the Elite agents think with their hearts instead of their heads... but you can't function in a black and white world like that. I agree they should be left alone to do the good work they've been doing for years, but... they've been exposed. They're not hidden anymore and simply put, they don't follow the rules. And if they don't follow the rules, they're gonna be kicked out of the game. It's my job to help them and the FBI find the middle ground... but neither side is bending." He scoffed. "Neither side. And that's what it's come down to. They all have the same end goal - take down the bad guys. And yet they fight like we're on opposite sides. If I defend the Elite, I'm a traitor. If I stick to the FBI's code, I'm an outsider." His tone grew softer. "It was supposed to blend better than this. But no matter how hard I try... everyone still picks a side."


Justin sighed and leaned back against the door frame after adjusting his backpack on his shoulder. "That's a good question." He was at least glad Sam was asking for some advice - most people around here weren't that willing to discuss things with him. Apparently they were uncomfortable with his profession. 

"I know Aaron is really good at putting on a gruff front, but I also know that underneath it, he's scared and vulnerable. He knows for sure that he's nothing but a prisoner - especially now - and that once the Elite has no more use for him, he'll be going to prison. Now, you and I know differently, but he has gone beyond being depressed, to accepting the worst case scenario as his fate because of the stunt he pulled. If he stays in that spot... he'll never survive in the world, and he will end up behind bars." He glanced at Hal, then back to Sam. "You did a great job showing him you could be his friend - if you want to truly help him, don't stop. I know it can't be easy after what he did, but he is truly convinced he has no worth. He's been thrown to the wolves by his own mother and sister, a girlfriend, and the Agency. And it takes an awful lot of love to break through those things." 

For a moment, he thought of Garret. He wished he could talk to the man more and help walk with him through some of his similar struggles, but he was pretty sure that was impossible after the way he'd lost it. He shook his head a little and brought his mind back on track. "It's... my recommendation that Aaron be given the same freedoms he was before. Reese and Kirk - and maybe you - aren't gonna like that, but if he's treated like a prisoner now, it will only serve to prove that really is all he's worth. We can't give up. Not yet. Not just because he pulled one stupid move. He needs to be held to his promise to provide intel - if he goes back on his word, that's another story, but I don't think he will. It speaks volumes that he even came back at all. It proves he knows this is his safe haven. He may not even realize that, but he was free... and he chose to come back here." He paused, looking Sam in the eye. "Like it or not... you're all he's got right now." 


Travis turned his head to look at Ashlee and grinned. "Yeah... you're probably right." Her slight blush and almost shyness there for a second hadn't escaped his attention, and he felt a little badly that he might have made her uncomfortable. It was also a good reminder to keep his head on straight... which was not always easy around her. 

Turning over, he mirrored her position, lying on his stomach and using his arms as his pillow, even if he would prefer to wrap them around her at the moment. "I, um... I'm having fun." His grin returned. "I hope you are too." 


"Yeah... yeah, okay." Jeff nodded at Rosetta. Right now, all he wanted to do was lie down. He tried to give her a smile the best he could though. "I'll try to make it to supper at least. I'll be fine." 

Once inside his bunk, he slipped off his boots and made it to his bed, easing down on his side to curl up with his pillow. Even if he wasn't as angry as he'd been a little while ago, he couldn't remove the worry for Katie. It still writhed under the surface and hurt his heart oh so much to think of his baby girl scared and on the run...

...It was a few hours later, and Jeff still lay in bed. He'd tried to get up once to go out to the barn, but had simply sank back down again without enough energy to do anything else. Looking at the clock, he sighed. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to start worrying about him now. He sat up again but all it did was make him feel dizzy. Making it to the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face, he could feel his pulse was faster than it should be. He didn't need anyone to take his blood pressure to know it was way too high. Which was probably why he was dizzy. 

Giving up, he wandered back to bed and laid down again. He had another half hour til supper. Maybe that's all he needed was another thirty minutes.


Jason followed Katie almost blindly as she led him back to the house and inside. The darkness was closing in, getting tighter and tighter. It was so similar and yet so different than what he'd experienced before with these episodes. Things had morphed so far beyond what a flashback would really be like, that it could hardly be called that, were it not for the nightmarish memories that invaded his mind. 

He tried to maintain control and leaned heavily on Katie as she took him downstairs and to the couch. But once he'd sat down, he couldn't hold it any longer. 

I'm so sorry... just don't let me go... don't leave me in this place...

The place was that horrid little room. The smells. The feelings. The sounds. It was all the same. 

In reality, Jason was now curled up on the couch as his body started to shake. He held Katie's hand in a vice grip as sweat poured down his face and neck, soaking his hair. His emotions were everywhere, and none were good. Frustration. Sadness. Desperation. But mostly terror. His eyes were clenched shut, hiding the persistent glow that signaled his heightened emotional state. 

He was huddled back in the corner of that room, his arms holding his legs tightly to his chest. A stench was in the air that made his stomach churn like it did most days. His ears picked up the sound of footsteps and his heart beat even faster. He tried to pull himself back into the corner even more, but it was impossible. Alex would know. He'd know about him trying to pick the lock again. And he did. After that came the beating. 

Jason writhed on the couch, trembling all over as the episode continued. The last few days had brought about such a similar fear of being caught that there was little hope he could have escaped without one of his flashbacks. Unfortunately, it was a bad one. 

Upstairs, Jed and Sarah had both witnessed the two coming back inside, and had both become concerned with how unwell Jason looked, and how concerned Katie had looked. Jed had called to them, but without an answer. Now both were on their feet, silently exchanging their own concerned looks. What was going on? Jed led the way to the basement stairs and quietly descended with his wife close behind. Almost to the bottom, both stopped and stared, wide-eyed. It looked like Jason was having some kind of seizure, but why wasn't Katie calling for help? 

"Katie?" Jed reached the basement floor, but took a step back as if he'd hit an invisible brick wall. The feeling was... overwhelming and terrifying. As a lamp on an end table started to shake, a chill ran down his spine and he motioned Sarah not to come all the way down. "Katie, what is going on? Do we need to call 911?"