Irrational Fear

Alec's eyes remained on the table as Misty took his trembling hand. At her words of encouragement, he could feel his emotions start to churn, and his eyes started to burn. It didn't feel okay to not be okay. He managed to nod numbly at her suggestion of taking their food to the park though. He really was hungry, and at least then they'd be outside in the fresh air where –

Another clatter from the kitchen, followed by a round of laughter from a nearby table sent Alec over the edge. Standing abruptly, he said nothing, but aimed for the door. Once outside, he put his hands to his head and leaned back against the building, trying just to breathe. He wasn't sure he'd ever experienced anything like this before... but he definitely didn't like it. He felt as if he had no control over his emotions, which right now included a very large dose of irrational fear and claustrophobia, topped with embarrassment.

He slowly lowered his hands as he took in his surroundings. There were plenty of people out here too, but at least he was in the open where he could move and think straight. A car backfiring made his whole body lurch. He'd never felt so jumpy in his entire life. It was ridiculous. And yet, for right now, he couldn't help it.


Dylan grinned again at Ashlee's messages. Was she hinting she missed him? He tucked the comment about pizza in the back of his mind before replying. Spy stuff? 

If I told you, I'd have to 
kill you... lol... 

Actually I've been learning 
a lot. I get to learn self-
defense from an ex Agency
operative who could scare 
the pee out of a someone just 
by looking at them. He's rough 
- I've got the bruises to 
prove it - but he's a good 
teacher.

He leaned his head back against the wall and thought some more. He talked to Hunter a little bit about what he was doing here, but it was different telling Ashlee. To her, it was... new. He couldn't help enjoying it just a bit. 

I get to make lots of copies
every day - that's exciting
lol... I help file things. 
Remember Con? I get to help
his wife with filing stuff. 
I'm learning how things run 
and it's pretty cool. I like 
it here.

After sending it, he considered that last line. Yes, he did like it here. And no matter how unsettled - or homesick - he felt at the moment... he was in this for as long as he'd committed. As long as the Elite wasn't shut down before then, he'd stay his three months. 


Jeff chuckled and nodded as he tucked his hands in his denim jacket pockets. "Yeah. She can run faster than me at the moment so I'd never be able to get away. I hear you're a pretty sharp bodyguard though." He nudged Katie with his shoulder as they walked. "I'm proud of you, ya know. I worry about what you do every day with the Elite... but I'm proud of you for doing what you love and what you believe in."

He slowed even more and eased down to sit on an old log that was alongside the pasture fence. His breathing had become just a little too labored for comfort. "I worry about the whole thing with you and Jason too. I know it's the Agency's doing, but if I'd never happened to take that medication in the first place... you'd be living a healthy, normal life." He gave her a sidelong glance along with a little grin. "Although I'm sure there's parts of being connected with Jason that you enjoy." It didn't take a genius to realize there were probably plenty of perks along with the negative side effects. 

Sighing, he leaned back against the fence post and patted her leg lovingly. "I'm sorry if I get upset over it too often though. I know you've accepted it, and I need to, too. I just... don't ever want to regret not spending enough time with you or... regret not doing enough or being enough for you."


Oh they're all good. Kaylee's being a pickle, but that's nothing new. 

Jason settled back and closed his eyes, simply enjoying the fact that he could relax without fear. 

Since we're only here for today, maybe we should get them to have a bonfire tonight to make sure we get to see everyone. Not that we're that important, but everybody likes s'mores, right?