Filing Drawer

Justin nodded and got up from the chair. "Okay. I'd still say still be careful, but I know you will be."

He turned to leave, then paused. "I can see a difference in him... You're doing a good job, even if it doesn't feel like it sometimes. He has a hard time trusting because of what's been done to him but... he needs to find someone he does trust... and when he does, he'll be loyal. Of that, I'm certain." Leaving Sam be, he aimed for the infirmary where his next job awaited. 


Even more heat crept up the back of Hal's neck, and his eyes darted to the floor. He chuckled nervously and shook his head. "That obvious, huh?" He groaned. "I really am an idiot." He hoped it at least wasn't too obvious who he was having difficulty communicating with. "But at least you think I'm normal." 

Smirking, he glanced back up at Hope again. "Thanks... I might be back to bang my head on the wall a few times." A little grin escaped before he turned around and left, sighing as he went. He nodded to Justin as they passed in the hall, and he returned to the security room. 

Flopping down in his chair, he spun around to reach into the small fridge, and pulled out two cokes, handing one to Sam. "Stopped by the filing room when I left Susanne's office," he mused. "Reached around the corner and turned the light on before I left... I think I heard someone's head hit an open filing drawer."


"How are you feeling today?" Justin straddled a chair backward in the infirmary, addressing Chance.

Chance sat cross-legged on the bed, his fingers picking at the blanket. "Um... okay." He wasn't curled up and unresponsive, so... that was better, right?

Justin cocked his head. "Not in such a dark place?"

Chance shrugged then shook his head. "Not... as much... maybe." 

"Good." The medication Justin and Misty had agreed on seemed to be helping - it at least had taken the edge off. "So, um... we haven't talked for several days now... think we could discuss a few things?"

Chance kept toying with the blanket. "I suppose," he answered quietly. 

Justin took a few seconds, and started out gently. "Can you tell me how long you've been working for the Underground?"

Chance swallowed hard. His eyes remained down. "A...a while." 

"How did they convince you to go back to them?"

Chance shrugged. 

Justin waited. "Did they force your hand somehow? Blackmail you? Threaten someone?"

Chance shook his head. He continued to pick at a loose thread. "N-no... I-I-I just... I just..." 

Justin tried to be patient. "Did you... want to go back to them?" 

Tears welled up in Chance's eyes as he nodded. It took several long moments before he could speak. "I knew I shouldn't... I... I just... I felt like... like I was missing... something."

Justin's brow furrowed. He really hadn't thought Chance would actually choose that path of his own free will. "Was it the adrenaline rush you wanted?" 

"I dunno."

"Was it... the excitement of being a double-agent?"

"Maybe." Chance scrunched his eyes shut tight. "They... they knew I wanted it... they knew I hadn't told the Elite everything the first time... I... I couldn't say no. It was like... like..." 

"Like you were... addicted?"

Chance sniffed and finally nodded. "I couldn't help myself," he whimpered. 

"But you knew you were betraying the Elite."

He nodded again. "I thought..." He sniffed and drew in a ragged breath. "I thought in the end it was justified. That... that the people deserved to die 'cause..." He swallowed again. "They needed to pay for their crimes." 

Justin sighed. "Did killing them give you the adrenaline you needed?"

Chance shook his head and pulled his knees up to hug his legs. "I had nightmares," he admitted softly as another tear rolled down his cheek. "But... but I was in too deep and... and I... I didn't want out."

"Without that conflict... you didn't know what to do with yourself... did you?" Justin's question was more of his own realization than a request for an answer. He wasn't surprised when Chance didn't respond. Seeing he'd withdrawn, he decided the short conversation would be enough for the day, and he stood. Chance had a bigger problem than he thought, and this was going to take time.

"You'll be fine," Hunter assured. He set a hand on Ryan's shoulder before leaning in and kissing her lips gently. "I have complete faith in you." Drawing back, he smiled. "Alright. Lead the way."

Getting into his own car, he started the engine and waited for Ryan. He'd follow, and he wouldn't push. He'd go her speed and just let her do whatever she needed to in order to be comfortable out here again. 


Jason chuckled and started walking again. "I'm not sure I know what it means exactly either. But I think it means... just not fighting it. Not just now, getting through this, but from here on out. When something happens... when we get sick or... or when I erupt... it means letting go and letting it evolve the way it wants. I don't think it has to be a disadvantage. I think it can make us stronger." 

He tightened his grip on her hand. "It already has." Glancing down at her, he smiled. "And I don't think journaling this is silly at all."